Once upon a time there was a little boy who very much wanted to be good.
Like most little boys, he was often distracted and slow to listen. His mother almost always called out her instructions twice in a soft voice. But when he didn’t respond the second time, she would snap at him in frustration then swat the back of his head to send him on his way. It was just a little slap.
One day, at the snap of her voice he flinched away from the expected little slap. She felt insulted. Instantly, the thought went through her head: “He’s acting like I’m abusing him! My little slap to his head, is just like that my mother used with me, and it doesn’t really hurt!” And in that moment between the snap of her voice, the flinch, and the swat to the back of his head, the swat became just a touch harder.
As usual, the boy was thinking: “Why is she snapping and slapping at me?! Doesn’t she know I meant no harm? I really am trying to be good!”
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